Kaylee: (to no one in particular) Mrs. B looks fancy today!

Evan: She doesn't look FANCY!

Clayton: (looking Evan up and down with disgust) This is coming from a dude in a tie-dyed tee shirt?!

Mrs. B: Where is Ferdinand?

Jasper: He went to the dentist.

Mrs. B: Oh. That's right. I forgot.

Jasper: Man, I hate the dentist!

Kevin: Yeah, it's like teeth detention.

Mrs. B: ...so I don't want to see anyone cutting their hair with these scissors.

Aspen: What about if we NEED a haircut?

Mrs. B: Then ask your mom to take you to get a haircut.

Aspen: What if we can't afford a haircut?

James: Yeah, what if we live in a box?

Aspen: YEAH! What if we live in a box?!!

Mrs. B: (tired of the silliness) No one here lives in a box!

Lee: We all sorta live in a box if you think about it.

Mrs. B: Clayton, are you alright? You look a little off.

Clayton: Well, I had to get up at 6:30 instead of 7:30 so I could catch the bus because my mom couldn't drive me to school. Then, 'cause I don't ride the bus all the time, the bus driver just drove off into the sunset and left me. Now you want us to work on our journals. MORE suffering!

Here is a picture of my new class:

Mrs. B: Clayton, I need for you to get busy writing that book report.

Clayton: But my grandpa eats dog biscuits.

(three second pause)

Mrs. B and about five nearby students: What?

During a discussion about the upcoming Labor Day weekend...

Jason: I'm going to San Diego!

Marcus: We're going to the lake!

Jessica: My grandma's coming to visit!

Taylor: What are you doing this weekend, Mrs. B?

Kayanne: I know what she's doing! She's SLEEPING!