Mrs. B: (taking care of some fund-raining business) Did anyone have cookie dough money to turn in?

Lee: Yeah. Man, I sold that stuff like crazy! I have a system and a STAFF!

Mrs. B: A staff?

Lee: Yup. I have my mom AND my stepdad working as salespeople! They're on my payroll.

Mrs. B: Are you sure you're a third-grader?

Mrs. B: What is the top number of a fraction called?

Class: The numerator!

Mrs. B: Great! And what is the bottom number called?

Class: The dominator!

Reed: So, Mrs. B, how long have you been married?

Mrs. B: Four years.

Reed: Wow! You must REALLY like him!

Mrs. B: You know, tomorrow is my wedding anniversary.

Reed: Please don't tell me you're going to wear your wedding dress to school!

About the tenth time someone asked me what time it was...

Teeny: Sheesh, people, will you give her a BREAK!?

In response to another exposure announcement...

Kiva: There's too many things going around. It's starting to annoy me.

So far this year, we had announcements go home for exposure to strep throat, lice, and chicken pox. Today, there was this...

Mrs. B: (looking at a new exposure announcement) You guys are little cootie-bugs! Now you've been exposed to scabies!

Reed: Okay, now they're just makin' up words!